The Guardian
Superclassico: 24th November, 2002

Peace for Figo? And pigs might fly ...

Will the Barcelona ultras ever leave Luis Figo alone? Sid Lowe thinks it's pretty unlikely on this evidence

Sid Lowe in Spain
Monday November 25, 2002


It was Lord of the Flies in the Barça-Madrid derbi on Saturday night. There may have been no sign of Ralph, Simon or Piggy - cake-filled Brazilian Ronaldo pulled out at the last minute - but the Camp Nou had everything else: hideously unequal rival tribes (98,000 culés to 400 Madridistas), ritual chanting, painted faces, and all the rational tranquility of a troop of public schoolboys on a desert island.
Above all, it had the Lord of the Flies himself. No, really, Sunday's pro-Madrid papers proved it. For there, staring up from the Camp Nou turf, was a real life, bona fidae pig's head, complete with porky grin. Not a full size, pig, alas: this head belonged to a "cochinillo" (a suckling pig), thrown onto the pitch as part of the latest, most surreal installment in the heartwarming love story that is FC Barcelona and Luis Figo.

Not that everyone believes in flying pigs, mind you. Barça director Gabriel Masfurrol, appearing on Ona Catalana radio last night, accused the Madrid press of making the whole thing up with the help of a cunningly-concealed cochinillo in the camera-bag, while fellow director José María Minguella provided conclusive proof that Barça fans couldn't have been responsible: "We don't even eat cochinillo in Barcelona", he said, licking his lips.

Stung by the accusations, Marca and AS reacted fast. Both have published lengthy responses this morning, complete with additional photos and the photographers' stories - AS's snapper was "disgusted" by what he saw, Marca's man "thought it was pretty funny".

Truth be told, the Lord of the Flies wasn't Luis Figo's biggest worry; it might have looked pretty grim, but it wasn't nearly as dangerous as the beer cans, lighters and plastic bottles that flew his way. And that wasn't all, either: some Madrid players claimed to have seen golf balls and a knife on the pitch, while television cameras zoomed in on a JB whisky bottle - a glass one.

The most dangerous moments came when Figo took Madrid's corners. The last time he visited the Camp Nou in white, Figo was ordered not to take them, even though he always does. This time, after a week of speculation and helpful "advice" - Marca's front page on Thursday read "Take them, Luis" - he did. "To do otherwise would be to act abnormally," claimed sporting director Jorge Valdano.

The decision could cost Barça dear: they could end up with a whopping fine and a Camp Nou ban - a ban that, in classic style, Madrid's sporting papers see as "inevitable", and Barcelona's view as "totally unnecessary and unfair".

The reason for a potential ban? Midway through the second half, Madrid won a corner at the Ultras' end of the ground. Amid a shower of flying objects, it took Figo two minutes to take it - and then he nearly scored, swinging in a deadly curler which keeper Bonano just managed to tip away. It would have been an amazing and hilariously appropriate response, but all Figo had done was win himself another chance to run the gauntlet. And this time the corner took even longer - as Figo jogged across to the other side, the missile throwing continued and referee Medina Cantalejo suspended the game for sixteen minutes to "let things calm down".

It was, said Marca, "the derbi of shame", while AS led on "Bronx Nou" and El Periódico de Catalunya declared "every corner a Vietnam". The pro-Barça sports dailies El Mundo Deportivo and Sport inevitably gave a very different version of events: Sport led on "Figo is a provoker" - the man who "poisoned the derby".

Their lead came from FC Barcelona's finest - manager and board accused Figo of inciting the crowd. By being on the pitch. And having the temerity to take the corners. Slowly.

"Figo provoked the fans," blasted Louis Van Gaal. "He walked over to the corner really slowly, picked up the bottle slowly, went back to the corner ... and all this consciously and deliberately, without the referee doing anything to stop it."

The board's reaction was even more critical. "I'm not trying to justify events," president Joan Gaspart said, trying to justify events, "but Figo's provocation was out of place and totally unnecessary. I won't accept people coming to my house to provoke". Director Joan Ignassi Brugeras, meanwhile, ranted that: "Figo lives off lies ... he's been provoking our fans for two years."

Even the more moderate opinion of Barça midfielder Xavi Hernández pointed the finger at Figo: "He could have helped more by not taking the corners."

It's true that Figo took his time over the corners, stopped to pick up a bottle, smiled "provocatively" at the fans and even gave a little thumbs up. But why shouldn't he take his time, move the bottles from the pitch, or make a point of showing them to the ref? And as for "helping" - like Barcelona helped when they refused to put nets up?

"I don't know if Gaspart is taking the piss," was Figo's incredulous response. As for Van Gaal, Figo was "plain surprised - after all, he never said anything when he was my manager for two years. And I've saved his arse more than once."

Inevitably, all the fuss has made Figo an even bigger Real Madrid hero. For AS, Figo was the top man, turning in a performance that was "perfect". An enormous exaggeration it most certainly is, but Figo's display - mentally, at least - was pretty impressive. So much so that even El Mundo Deportivo's Cristina Cubero was impressed: "Figo can be proud", she wrote, "he won the battle".

The battle, yes. But what about the match? Er, yeah. The match, wrote Marca's Roberto Palomar, "was shit"